Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
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For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
she pinky promised me she was 18
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
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Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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