She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
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