Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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