I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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