I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
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