I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
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The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
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Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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