i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize