Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
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