Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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