when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize