I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize