Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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