Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
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