APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize