I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize