Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize