Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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