Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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