Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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