Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize