She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
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