I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize