Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize