I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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