My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
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