I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
i think i have herpe
just one?
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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