Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
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