I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
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He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
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I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
The adults are the big ones right?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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