So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
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Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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