Cold hands, warm shart.
At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize