I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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