Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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