great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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