It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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