You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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