I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you will always have a special place in my vag
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize