Dual....:-)
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
These tits shall not be calmed
Randomize