i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Drunk is a universal language darling
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize