kristin has been a bad kristin
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize