you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize