I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
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