I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize