I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Randomize