apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Randomize