I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
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