what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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