i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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