Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
that is very illegal...i love you.
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