did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize