hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Boobs speak an international language.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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